The city of New York has determined that people of color pee on the sidewalk more than white people, therefore it is racist to make arrests for it. Also, white people must be quieter than blacks and Hispanics, so that law will no longer be enforced.
Council member Melissa Mark-Viverito explains:
“We know that the system has been really rigged against communities of color in particular. So the question has always been, what can we do in this job to minimize unnecessary interaction with the criminal justice system, so that these young people can really fulfill their potential?”
I can see one of these people doing a job interview:
BOSS: “Can you run a forklift?”
Interviewee: “No, but I can make noise on the sidewalk. At the same time, if necessary.”
When Rudy Giuliani was first elected mayor, crime rates were high. Rudy decided to enforce quality of life laws. Sure enough, crime rates dropped. Now the city council is reversing the process. It will be interesting to see the results.
“Hey, is it raining?”
“No, I’m peeing on your leg.”
“Hey, you wanna job?”
On Monday, the city council is meeting and they will lower the penalty for such crimes as public urination, excessive noise, drinking in public, marijuana possession and miscellaneous public park-related infractions. The council is hoping that it will lead to less arrests. Violators will be given a ticket, for which they are expected to pay anywhere from $25 dollars to $250, for a first offense. New York could become a new vacation spot for perverts who are into golden showers. Quality of life crimes have been infrequently enforced since de Blasio has become mayor and witnesses say they have seen bums peeing, pooping and masturbating next to the Cooper Union for the Advancement of Science and Art.
I think New York City would be a great place to skip on those hot muggy days when the wind blows and spreads the smell of pee, for blocks.