8. Nursing Home Attendant
Insofar as they are living at home without a car, eighth graders fall squarely—and regrettably, to some—under their parents’ purview. This means that they are subject to replying to their parents’ tiresome questions and answering their demands. U.S. New reports that age 12 is about when kids start to understand the value of money, specifically the concept of investing for the longer term.
Eighth graders love their money, and will know how to save it as well as (if not better than) adults. Since eighth graders are already used to doing things their elders ask of them in exchange for money, working in a nursing home is a natural extension of this dynamic.
Given the aging Baby Boomers we always hear so much about, and assuming that elderly millennials will be as lazy in retirement as they are as members of the workforce, this vocation promises to provide a future good job security for the current middle school demographic, if they prove as willing to empty a colostomy bag as they are to shovel the driveway.