I still remember the day John*, a lanky Year 3 student, approached me at a university gathering. The 24-year-old asked what my position was. He looked impressed after I told him that one of my jobs was to assess him. He started to flirt. “So if we’re good friends, will you give me a good assessment?” he teased.
He was cute, so I played along. “Sure,” I smiled. I’ll take you up on your offer then,” he grinned. He asked for my number and started sending me suggestive SMSes. Three days later, we went on our first date and ended up having sex in a hotel. Turned out he was a virgin. John was awkward and boring in bed but the thrill of breaking a virgin in was worth the hook-up. Plus, the fact that he was “clean” meant I didn’t have to worry about him passing on a sexually transmitted disease (STD) to me.
That was how I started sleeping with the students I mentor. Throughout the semester I was mentoring them, I could tell from their body language – like eye contact, or leaning just that bit closer when asking me a question – that they were sexually attracted to me. After the semester ended, they asked me out and the sexual liaisons began. Since John, I’ve slept with two other virgin students, also in their early 20s. So far, I’m carrying on an affair with only one of them. John started to get clingy and the other bored me. To avoid complications, I’ve not worked with or kept in touch with either of them.
I do not settle for less. I have six other regular sex partners – exes and old friends – to occupy me. Compared to my more experienced friends, these virgins are not at all fun to have sex with. They can get it up but they don’t know what to do with it. Some even look terrified because they know they are going to sleep with someone who has much more experience in sex than them.
But what really irritates me is their tendency to stare at my naked body until I’m left feeling extremely uncomfortable and self-conscious. And after the deed is done, they like to act all macho and think they’re Casanova.
But I sleep with them anyway because it boosts my ego, and I like sex. After a day of hard work, I’d rather have plenty of sex than go shopping.
From their academic performances, I know the boys I’ve slept with are on track to having high-flying careers. When they are successful, I can look back and think: oh, I’ve already slept with him.
Besides finding me attractive and mentally stimulating, they sleep with me because they believe that if I have a good impression of them, I’d give them a good assessment. Thing is, the students I choose to sleep with are the ones who wouldn’t need the “extra effort” to get a good evaluation. As a supervisor, I know that if I endorse a guy who isn’t up to standard, it’ll just look bad on me. My good assessment will be based on their work performance.
That’s just a moral responsibility on my part. Apart from the thrill of deflowering them, I choose them because I already know how smart and academically competent they are – in fact, I chose to sleep with them because I am attracted to their intelligence. But they’re clueless about this, which works for me.
How these boys think doesn’t come as a surprise, because their behavior reminds me of myself as a junior. I probably got to where I am today because I granted sexual favors to my supervisors when I was doing my degree overseas. But I was smart about the way I went about things. First, I made sure that I studied hard, and earned the solid academic credits.
Should anything go awry over a sexual affair, I could always change supervisors or go to another university. Second, I didn’t and I still don’t, sleep with my direct supervisors – it’s too risky because just as they can grant me favors, they can also flunk me. I sleep only with those in senior positions who have an influence on my direct supervisor. If I’m in their good books, they can put in a good word for me.
I made myself available due to a mixture of lust and a desire for good assessment. I find it a turn-on knowing that someone of a much higher standing in the organisation likes me and wants to sleep with me. I’ve had to work with these superiors after I’ve slept with them but it was never awkward. Everything went smoothly for me because I was their “pet student”.
And I believe that at the start of your career, it’s easier to take chances because at that point, you have nothing to lose.
No kissing and telling
My friends call me a “Cougar” – an older woman who preys on younger men. These young men’s naivete makes them easy targets for a cheap thrill. I don’t have to worry about them kissing and telling. Why would they want everyone to think they’ve only got to where they are now because they slept their way up?
I am also definitely not the only one who has slept with superiors for better results. The junior boys whom I slept with told me that some of their female peers only want to date senior members of staff whom they have plenty of admiration for. These older men are charismatic; a quality that would make any young woman they’re mentoring weak in the knees. Sexual tensions could then arise.
Risking my career
I speak from my personal experience, and you shouldn’t assume that it happens across the board.
I know that my promiscuous lifestyle puts my career and health at risk. I don’t know if and when the people I’ve slept with will expose me, mar my reputation and ruin my career. I also had a cervical cancer scare recently. There’s always a risk of contracting STDs.
But in my mind, promiscuity is part of human nature, and I can’t get enough of the sexual thrill.
*Names and details have been changed to protect identities
She sounds like a sexual predator and a borderline sociopath. The sick thing about it is if she’s hot then most men would give her a pass on the predatory side of her.
Read more here.