An insane Hillary supporter, 32-year-old Christina Ferguson, (Is there any other kind?) decided she would vandalize the cars of Trump supporters by spreading peanut butter all over them. She did spread peanut butter all over thirty cars, but the problem was, she was in the wrong parking lot and the cars she vandalized had nothing to do with Donald Trump. During her rampage she yelled her support for Hillary and her unbridled hatred for Trump. She had been seen in the parking lot before and soon people went outside to make sure she wasn’t doing anything to their cars and they caught her in the act.
Now, the fact she had the wrong cars was funny enough but what I think is really funny is who the cars belonged to that provides the most laughter. They were liberal environmentalists of the ‘Tomorrow River Valley Conservation Club’.
Portage County Sheriff’s Office were called and went to her home. While simultaneously denying her role in the incident, Ferguson kept licking her fingers in an attempt to hide the buttery substance, reported SPCT.
She eventually succumbed to questioning though, admitting she thought it was a meeting of Donald Trump supporters and she wanted to demonstrate “how much she loved Hillary Clinton and hated Donald Trump.”
“Peanut buttering is better than firebombing, and Trump plans on firebombing everybody in other countries,” Ferguson said, according to the complaint lodged by police.
Alcohol may have also played a factor in her enhanced political motivation. After admitting to drinking beer and brandy on the night, she blew a .218 on a breathalyzer, putting her well beyond the legal limit.
Ferguson has been charged with disorderly conduct.